I’m worried about the therapists…and the invisible front-line
“I’m worried….” is not an uncommon statement to hear coming from my mouth. In the past year or so, I’ve been trying to really notice how often I start sentences with “I’m worried…” It’s been eye-opening because I don’t consider myself a terrible anxious person (neurotic is another story…perhaps my neuroses works so well that I don’t even notice obvious signs of anxiety. Who knows!!)
So when I say “I’m worried about the therapists….” I don’t say that lightly.
I’m worried about the therapists.
While I’m on clinical sabbatical, I’m working with a LOT of therapists in consultation- individually and in groups. I’m a part of several therapist social media groups, including one I moderate. I am continuing to teach a lot of therapists. I’ve got a pretty good pulse on what’s going on behind closed doors for these invisible front-line workers.
And it’s not good.
Being a therapist is really really really really really really hard. The in-the-room work is exhausting but also so amazingly rewarding…and when we’ve got a good balance going on, the rewards are so great that we can keep moving through the exhaustion.
Eight weeks ago therapists across the country (world, probably, though I have less awareness of what’s going on outside the US) were thrust into a way of doing therapy that most did not ask for- telehealth. While tele-mental health isn’t new, it was new for the majority of therapists on March 15, 2020 when the country shut down (and some of our NYC area therapists have been locked down even longer).
Therapists took their caseloads and moved to a platform they knew nothing about, weren’t comfortable with, and had no interest in using.
Thank you.
All of the sudden, they were utterly and completely alone.
With a platform they didn’t know and didn’t like.
They showed up to do their jobs with their foundation crumbling. When you haven’t ever done telehealth before, you have a HUGE adjustment to figure out how to create relational connection- the absolute FOUNDATION of doing our work and doing it well.
Now do this with 20 or 30 people in crisis. All at the same time.
NOW do this with children.
Watch your client’s struggle while you sit helplessly on the other side of the screen. Then the screen freezes. The client can’t see or hear you for a moment. There is a time lag. Then the software crashes. You both try to reconnect.
NOW do this while you are experiencing the exact same crisis that all your clients are experiencing.
I’m worried.
Dear therapists. I see you. I’m shaken down with gratitude that you just keep trying. You keep using a platform you hate. You miss your clients, your office. You’ve been waiting for this to be over and just get back to your four walls.
And now you realize that there is no going back to what it used to be.
Therapists are brainstorming how on earth they will sanitize their toys. Which toys should I get rid of? Which toys are cheap enough that Ican make individual play therapy kits for all my clients? What do I take out the waiting room? What sanitizing practices between clients are sufficient? How am I at risk? How are my clients at risk? Do we insist clients wear masks?
Dear therapists. I see you. I have no solution but I see you. We will probably lose some of you and I get it. This is so hard.
Our very very hard jobs have gotten very very much harder.
I see you.
I’m thinking about you all the time. My husband has heard me say “I’m worried about the therapists…” a lot. Like….many times every single day. Especially at the end of the day. I’m trying to figure out what to do. I have no idea.
So this is my first step. A little note. I see you
Thank you for continuing to try. And when you just can’t try anymore, I understand.
Robyn
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Robyn Gobbel, LCSW, RPT-S (when not in the middle of the coronavirus pandemic) is a blogger, teacher, trainer, and consultant for therapists and professionals working with children with a history of complex trauma.
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This made me cry…I’ve been feeling so burnt out, I get no energy or satisfaction from my work, I’ve already lost half of my caseload and the thought of taking a new referral at this time makes me spin with anxiety. And all the while I’m just trying to be grateful to have a job and an income, but I feel like no one understands.
I understand, Jenna. And all the therapists who consult with me are saying something really similar. Burnt out, low energy, almost dread….yet grateful for work…yet afraid to take new clients. It’s so complicated. Hang in there.
All my best,
Robyn
We are all in this together experiencing similar issues,, teachers, students, health care workers, schools, essential workers, business owners, etc, etc, we are all adjusting and being asked to do things and suddenly put in situations that we didn’t sign up for. Just remember one is not alone because everyone is experiencing similar adjustments of being suddenly thrown into things unexpectedly. My daughter in pre med was jolted into the world of online learning and during the peak of finals. The whole University which is just one had to come up with online curriculum in 2 weeks for every class, my other daughter a graduating senior was thrown into this also the end of the school year, her senior year, teachers adjusting to teaching online. I’ve been working this whole time in healthcare while others can stay home or in offices behind closed doors not having to be exposed to anyone else . I can’t without quitting and how’s a person to find another job right now.
It’s easy to feel alone and abandoned trying to take care of others and oneself without as much support as I’m feeling it too. I also go to a therapist and experience the technology freezing almost every time so I resorted to phone conversations. But I’m so grateful I can continue my appointments. In short we are all in this together.
I feel flexibility is key and saying no and good boundaries whenever feasible. For example, they wanted us at work to clean which isn’t normally our job duties. I have sensitivity to the chemicals in the cleaner and spoke up about it. And they got someone else to do the cleaning who is more than happy to do it. I also see people doing acts of support for others in the community, businesses supporting other businesses, and a lot of new and creative innovation going on. When stuck with a challenge, I see a lot of people and busineses developing solutions. Flexibility, adjusting, innovation, creativity, growth. transformation, speaking up for what is working and not working, setting boundaries, self care, etc. The new and crisis, always presents situations of stress, but also opportunity for growth, and innovation. I’m also focusing on what to be grateful for. I don’t have the privilege to work behind closed doors of not being exposed to 200 people in the public a week in healthcare. But I’m grateful I have a job and income that many don’t write now. If I could work from home and not be exposed to the public, I would be grateful for that. I see this an an opportunity for more awareness to be brought into society for mental health, more people seeing and accepting a need for mental health, more opportunity for there to be less stigma about it, and an opportunity to create more ways for people to access mental health help that didn’t previously exist. As long as I get through this without getting sick I’m counting my blessings
We’re all in this together.
Thank you for this. It made me cry a little. I’m feeling burnt out and overwhelmed. This made me feel heard. I am inspired by the hard work and commitment of my fellow therapists, but I also know that struggle. It helps to know I am not alone in it.
Thanks Paula. It is so inspiring but I also recognize the danger in ONLY talking about the inspiring good work. It’s hard and a lot of the therapists I know hate it (and some love it! Which is fantastic!!!). You aren’t alone.
All my best,
Robyn
Thank you for this. It’s so validating and helpful to be seen. Even with a lighter case load, it’s exhausting. I never had an interest in telehealth. But I want to care for my clients and I’m grateful for a way to do that. It just takes another level of energy to connect via video. It helps to be seen.
Tele health is SO exhausting and like anything else, takes time to build up the ‘muscle.’ We had no time. Take care of yourself!
All my best,
Robyn
Thank you. I am a therapist who is using doxy.me for telehealth and after the learning curve am really liking it. My clients are as well. Some ask if we can continue this way. It gives me a different perspective on their lives since I get a glimpse of their homes. Some have introduced me to their children who wander in. Some have introduced me to their dogs and cats. I have a few who have wanted to wait. I also agree that it is challenging being immersed in emotion soup more than usual since the acuity level is higher. There are days when I feel wrung out. I am grateful for my job and needing to be available to them helps me remain ‘sane and vertical,’ as I like to call it. Be well, y’all.
There are definitely some really fun benefits to telehealth :) It’s been fun to see therapists come around to see the cool things that can happen! I think the biggest problems are everything surrounding the telehealth. How quickly therapists had to learn a new platform, a new way to do therapy- with their ENTIRE CASE LOAD at once. That’s a lot of feeling inadequate…while also dealing with the pandemic themselves. And now the idea of transitioning back….
Be well :) Thanks for dropping in and doing the good, hard work. It is fun to meet their dogs and cats (and I’ve heard stories about being lugged around the house, including to the bathroom!!!!!)
All my best,
Robyn
I truly and wholeheartedly appreciate this. I am a new counselor to the field, beginning December 2019. I am also 10 weeks pregnant and feeling extremely burnt out and very alone. Thank you so much for sharing these words to remind me I am not alone.
Robyn,
Thank you for this post. It was lovely to read. It has been challenging for us. I feel for us too. Thank you for seeing me. I see you too.
Emily
I really appreciate this. I had the unfortunate timing of starting a community mental health position right as this was all starting, so the virus/quarantine + the regular stress of starting a new job, saying good bye to my old clients as this was starting, trying to establish new relationships with people I’ve never seen or met, while covering for another therapist’s clients who’s on leave. All with new clients who are the most vulnerable members of the population. It’s been a lot. It’s been the most stressful and least rewarding work of my career, and I’ve wondered if I should stick with it, especially given the growing realization that the old way I did therapy, that I loved and found so valuable, will not exist in this new world, at least not for a while. This is really hard, and it often feels like we’re getting overlooked in the (understandable) outpouring of support for medical workers. So I appreciate this post so much.