Secure Relating with Guests Sue & Ann from Therapist Uncensored {EP 175}


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Settle in for a fun and inspiring chat with hosts from Therapist Uncensored and authors of the new release Secure Relating, Sue Marriott & Ann Kelley.

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • How responding to our children’s (and partner’s) needs in the present moment, instead of from a place of anxious or avoidant states, can improve our relationships
  • About the intersection of attachment and trauma in our systems of care- like the child welfare and mental health systems
  • How much hope there is when we shift to looking at attachment in the here and now instead of based on our histories

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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When It’s Hard To Keep Offering Connection {EP 174}


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I’m sure you’ve had moments (days, weeks, months) where it felt hard, maybe even impossible, to keep offering connection to your child.

It is hard to offer connection to someone who seems to constantly reject it!

If it feels hard to keep offering your child connection, I actually want you to shift your focus. Don’t prioritize offering connection to your child. Instead think about:

  • Who can offer YOU connection?
  • How can you offer connection to yourself?
  • Who could you offer connection to who is able to receive it, and offer connection back?

You’ll also learn how glitter boots are related to giving and receiving connection!

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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Are Connected Kids Always Cooperative? {EP 173}


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If regulated, connected kids who feel safe do well, does that mean connected kids are always cooperative?

Definitely not! In fact, there’s a level of connection to others- and to themselves! – that invites in the safety to be UNcooperative!

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • How safety can invite both cooperative and UNcooperative behavior
  • Why too much cooperative would actually be a bad thing
  • How parenting with co-regulation and connection helps kids become more connected to themselves

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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What Does It Mean To ‘Heal’? {EP 172}


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The question of ‘can I heal’ or ‘can my child heal’ or ‘how do I (or my child) heal’ is a tricky one. 

Healing is a word that gets used a lot without really pausing to ask ourselves what it actually means. 

If we are aiming for a nebulous goal that hasn’t been defined, it will feel impossible to reach. Impossible tasks often feel hopeless.

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • Why it’s most useful to stay focused on widening our window of stress tolerance
  • How co-regulation contributes to healing
  • How memory relates to trauma symptoms and healing

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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Living With Someone Chronically Dysregulated {EP 171}


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Do you live with someone or love someone who is chronically dysregulated?

This episode isn’t an episode that is going to tell you what to do.

This is an episode of commiseration. Of “I see you.”

It is exhausting to live with someone who is chronically unhappy, or chronically dysregulated. Knowing you’re not alone can help.

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • How nervous systems match each other
  • How we get our sense of safety from the state of each other’s nervous system
  • The serve & return and rhythms of relationship, and what happens when that gets disrupted 

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

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The Privilege of Parenting With Safety {EP 169}


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Parenting with co-regulating and seeing below our kids behaviors is actually a privilege we rarely talk about. It’s always a privilege, but especially when we consider different marginalized and oppressed identities that a lot of kids- and those of you listening- intersectionally hold. 

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • The definition of privilege (it is NOT a criticism)
  • The privilege of safety for folks with histories of trauma
  • The privilege of safety for folks with other marginalized and oppressed identities
  • How this relates to parenting 

Resources mentioned in this podcast:

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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I HATE YOU! And Other Big Feelings {EP 168}


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Kids with vulnerable nervous systems often say BIG, hurtful, and scary words. They say things like “I hate you!” or “You hate me!” They sometimes threaten to hurt themselves- or you! Verbal aggression almost always pulls us right onto the watchdog pathway ourselves- which is understandable. Let’s talk about how you might respond if you’re able to hang onto your owl brain.

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • To stay focused on the level of activation, not the words being said
  • What to say (if anything) back to statements like “I hate you,” “I wish you’d never adopted me,” or “I’m going to hurt you.” 
  • How to start listening for what’s really being expressed

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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Silliness As A Sign Of Dysregulation {EP 167}


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Have you ever felt confused by your child’s silly behavior? It seems like they are having fun, but it doesn’t feel good at all?

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • How to tell the difference between fun-silly and dysregulated-silly
  • What’s going on in the brain and nervous system for a child who is dysregulated-silly
  • Practical ideas for how to support your child returning to regulation, connection, and felt safety

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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1% Better Is Enough. {EP 166}


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Parenting ‘experts’ forget to tell you the most important thing.

All this advice???

You’ll never do it all the time or even most of the time.

You don’t need to.

That’s not the point.

Together – me and you – let’s just aim for 1% better. 

Professionals- this ones for you, too. 

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • A parenting professionals #1 job is to trust their clients
  • Aim for 1% improvement. 5% ‘getting it right’ is better than 4%!
  • Professionals don’t need all the answers. They need to believe their clients and not give up

Resources Mentioned on the Podcast

Listen on the Podcast

This blog is a short summary of a longer episode on The Baffling Behavior Show podcast.

Find The Baffling Behavior Show podcast on Apple Podcast, Google, Spotify, or in your favorite podcast app.

Or, you can read the entire transcript of the episode by scrolling down and clicking ‘transcript.’

Robyn

Author of National Best Selling Book (including audiobook) Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work

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